You know that feeling – you need to have a tough conversation with an employee, but you’re dreading it. What if they get defensive? What if it makes things worse? What if they quit and take your best people with them?
Many business leaders avoid these conversations because they don’t want to deal with the drama. But avoiding workplace conflict doesn’t solve the problem. It just lets it fester.
What if, instead of bracing for a fight, you approached workplace conflict with curiosity?
Workplace Conflict Resolution Starts with Curiosity
Think about the last time someone snapped at you or seemed off their game. Your first instinct might have been frustration. But instead of judging or reacting, what if you asked a simple question: What’s going on?
Curiosity opens doors to understanding. It shifts the conversation from blame to problem-solving. Instead of assuming the worst, you start gathering information. This approach aligns with the Gallup Q12 engagement questions, which emphasize the importance of employees feeling understood and valued.
Don’t Take It Personally
Most workplace conflicts aren’t about you. You’re just the person someone is upset with at the moment. When you take things personally, you react emotionally instead of responding thoughtfully.
We’ve all had an employee who was once the top performer then suddenly starts missing deadlines and making mistakes. Instead of assuming they’ve become lazy, ask questions: I’ve noticed your work has been slipping. What’s going on? How can I support you? Maybe they’re dealing with personal struggles, burnout, or unclear expectations. By being curious instead of accusatory, you create space for an open conversation.
Recognizing Hidden Causes Behind Workplace Behavior
People’s actions often stem from struggles outside of work. When you see a change in behavior, instead of reacting, dig deeper. Here are a few common examples:
- An employee who starts yelling. Maybe they’re dealing with stress at home or they feel unheard at work. Instead of immediately disciplining them, be curious.
- A normally engaged worker who’s disengaged. Perhaps they’re unclear on their role, feel undervalued, or have personal challenges affecting their focus. Instead of putting them on probation right away, be curious.
- A team member who cuts corners. Maybe they’re overwhelmed and don’t know how to ask for help. Instead of firing them, be curious.
By being curious instead of making assumptions, you can uncover the root cause and offer real solutions. This leads to productive workplace conflict resolution.
Note: This isn’t to suggest that you ignore bad behavior or that the reasons are a justification. By addressing issues as they come up, you’ll be more equipped to help your people navigate challenging times while still being a productive and approachable member of the team.
Reframing Situations to Foster Empathy
If you can’t ask someone directly, reframe the situation. Imagine you’re driving down the highway and someone cuts you off. Your immediate reaction might be anger. Afterall, they put you and your family in danger. But what if they just got a terrible phone call and are rushing to a loved one in the hospital? When you reframe situations, you stop seeing people as the problem and start seeing them as humans dealing with challenges.
Workplace conflict is no different. When an employee lashes out or shuts down, consider what might be happening beneath the surface. A simple shift in perspective can lead to better conversations and develop stronger relationships.
Empathy Training: A Tool for Curiosity and Resolution
Curiosity and empathy go hand in hand. Many business leaders invest in empathy training to help their teams communicate better and resolve conflicts more effectively.
Empathy training helps employees:
- Ask thoughtful questions instead of making assumptions.
- Listen actively without rushing to conclusions.
- Approach problems with a mindset of understanding, not blame.
Companies that prioritize curiosity and empathy see a stronger team culture, better retention, and higher employee engagement.
Why Aren’t We More Curious?
We live in a world where information is always at our fingertips. If you have a question, you can Google it. But human interaction isn’t like Google. Real understanding comes from asking, listening, and engaging.
If you’re struggling to resolve conflict in the workplace, be curious. Ask better questions. Seek to understand before you react. That’s the key to better workplace conflict resolution.
Need help improving communication and resolving workplace conflict? Core Matters helps blue collar business leaders build stronger teams through better hiring and leadership strategies. Call us today to learn how we can support your team’s success!
